Archive for April, 2011

Just One Daddy, but…

April 27, 2011 Leave a comment

I think I have mentioned this before, but Benjamin has a habit of trying to tell Matthew what to do or lecturing him.  The other night, before Andrea got home from work, I was telling Matthew not to do something.  Benjamin, not wanting to miss the opportunity, started to lecture Matthew as well.  I interrupted and told him that I am Matthews daddy and he does not need another daddy.

To which, Benjamin replied, “But Mommy isn’t home and he needs both a daddy and a mommy to tell him what to do.”

Poor Matthew.


Once Again, Busted

April 22, 2011 Leave a comment

The other day, Matthew was playing a video game where cartoon characters are racing each other in cars when we heard him say, “They are driving like idiots.”

Andrea started laughing, but I paused trying to figure out where I had heard that before, right down to the inflection in his voice. Andrea asked me where he might have heard it and it dawned on me. So I turned to Andrea and acted out a typical car ride for us:

“daddy, why are you yelling at those other cars?”

“They are driving like idiots.”

I really need to watch what I say in front of the kids.

Pretty Strong Opinions on Girls

April 21, 2011 Leave a comment

Benjamin was asking one of his normal questions about how humans are made (“What is under our skin?”, “What is blood?”, etc.) when, out of no where, Matthew asks, “Girls are not human, right?” I laughed and asked him if he meant “Squirrels.”



“Yes! They got funny hair and look funny.”

Through my laughter, “Girls are human.”

To which Matthew replied, “But they are so weird.”

He doesn’t know the half of it!

Two Chocodiles

April 18, 2011 2 comments

A lot of people, when they come back from California, come back with wine stuffed in their suitcase.  When I came back from California, I came back with Chocodiles stuffed in my suitcase.

For those of you wondering what a Chocodile is, think Twinkie covered in chocolate.  When I was a kid, I use to love Chocodiles.  The local Quick Check use to have them for 25 cents and I would get them when I could.  In those days, Chauncey Chocodile was good friends with Twinkie the Kid and life was good (Chauncey has a Facebook page…he is lonely, you should friend him).

Sometime towards the end of the last century, Hostess stopped distributing them on the East Coast with only a handful of factories making them on the West Coast.  Because of Hostess freshness standards, that is where the Chocodiles remain today.  So, on my previous three trips to California, I would go out of my way to find the elusive treat, but had no luck.  My most recent trip looked as if it were headed the same direction.

I went to the local Walmart and found the other Hostess products…I was disappointed to not find any there.  However, as I walked out, to a chorus of angels (and I am pretty sure the roof opened up and a ray of light shined down on them), I spotted them!  I felt like King Arthur receiving Excalibur from the Lady in the Lake as I grabbed them.  Much like when I was a kid, they were individually sold, but now cost 66 cents.  So, obviously, I grabbed as many as I could (regretting the fact that I hadn’t grabbed a cart on my way in) and a Rubbermaid to protect them in my bag on the way back east (I did make a second trip back to the Walmart to restock…they are so damn good).

When I got home, I did share one with the boys…Thats right, I said “one” and I’m not ashamed of it!  The are still content with lesser treats like Ding Dongs and Ho Hos…I’m not wasting these wonderful delicacies on their immature taste buds.  Of course, I have them sitting on my desk in the office in full view, torturing the boys.

So, anyway, a few weeks have now past and my Chocodile supply has dwindled down to two and Benjamin came up to me and asked if he and Matthew could have a Chocodile.  With no shame, I explained to him that I didn’t have enough for him and Matthew, despite the fact they were in his full view.  He pointed at them and counted them, “One, two…”, and then points at himself and says, “One” and then at Matthew, “Two.”

He may be a clever boy, but he didn’t get my Chocodile.  The last two are for a special occasion…I’m not sure what that occasion is, but I have to think quick…The freshness date is April 19.

P.S. Soon after writing the draft of this, I deemed writing a blog post about how I selfishly hoard snack cakes from my own children worthy of being a special occasion and I am now down to one lonely little Chocodile.

What Focus Problem?

April 13, 2011 4 comments

As I have previously talked about in this blog, Benjamin has had some problems in school and with his teacher.  One of the issues she has cited is a lack of focus on his part.  The thing he has complained about the most is being bored.  Of course, I have seen no evidence of this, whatsoever(*sigh*).  This is a drawing he did on the back of his schoolwork.  You will notice the math problem in the middle of the Angry Bird’s face, as well as the broken pieces of wood the Blue Bird has just smashed.

Needless to say, when I pulled this out of his folder, it took Andrea and I a good five minutes to stop laughing…You just never expect to see something like this staring at you as you go through your kids schoolwork.  He admitted that the green “C” from his teacher, indicating he solved the equation correctly, was the last think drawn on the page.

Lately, a lot of his school work has come back like this…Some drawings more intricate than others, like, for example, the exploding volcano that has a variety of Angry Birds flying out the top and the piggies fleeing from the base.

On a serious note, this is more evidence that his teacher doesn’t recognize that Ben is bored.  Not only does he have time to do these drawings as the rest of his class finishes their work, but he is also doing the extra work (the simple equation in the center) that the teacher is putting on the board for kids that finish ahead of time.  It seems the only challenge he is getting at school is how to best incorporate the school problems into his drawings.

Throwing Rocks

April 10, 2011 1 comment

Yesterday, we were wandering around with some friends when Benjamin threw a pretty big rock.  I told him to stop throwing rocks and that there is never, ever a good time or excuse to throw rocks.

Without even waiting a moment, he immediately said back to me, “What about skipping stones on the lake?”

Knowing I had been defeated (again) by a five year old, I simply walked away.

Luck Day and a Fun Night at the “Game”

April 9, 2011 Leave a comment

Yesterday, I got a bunch of suite tickets for the Lehigh Valley IronPigs, the Phillies triple-A farm team, from my company and the boys were REALLY excited to go.  However, they were seriously disappointed to see all the rain coming down as we were driving home from school before the game.

As we were driving, Ben said, “If the game doesn’t get rained out it will be my lucky day!”

Since he had mostly been bored at games in the past, I asked, “Really?”

“Yes,” he said in a very patronizing tone. “I already had ice cream today!”

For the record, the game was rained out, but we had a fantastic time in the suite with friends of ours before it was called (the game was suppose to start at 7:05 and the called it just before 8:00, but we hung around until around 8:30, 9:00).  We then all went over to Friendlys and our boys sat in a booth by themselves with or friends kids while the adults sat in another booth.  It was very cute as the waitress attempted to take the ice cream order from the “herd of cats” and watching the four of them goofing around as we, the grown ups, were able to have a relatively uninterrupted conversation.

We all had a really nice time.  It was one of the best times I’ve had at a “game”.